Last night I blew my hair dry for the first time in four years. It's bad for it and I have a history of damaged hair, so I'm pretty paranoid about it, because my hair is the thing I'm most vain about. I only did it because my time frame was much tighter than I thought, and I felt strange after.
My hair was soft. My hair is never soft, at least not the way I want it to be, and today I got that result on accident without intent. Only through damage could I get what I wanted.
I had to hurt myself to get the softness I desperately desire. How sick.
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